GAWD, I HATE THIS.

I HATE THIS VERY, VERY, VERY, VERY MUCH.

Still being influenced by Supernatural. Hate-spewing speeches. *teeth gnashing*

It's all cool.

---

Hey, is my obsession really random of me? I have been obsessed by boybands before, so I guess not eh.

And because this is not the time for Grey's or House, and anyway I just have half of the latest season of Grey's, and not sure where I'm up to with House now. Got S6 burnt to CD. But I won't watch them both because I'll rather watch Supernatural since I've dl-ed it as a complete season. Whoo yeah.

I really feel like going more the cool chick route than the dainty one look. Hah.

Blah. But then I'm just a girl, not yet a woman. -_-

And I actually get influenced to act more like the male characters than the female ones, since the male ones are the leads. -_-

Ghost busting never looked this good.

I was referring to my last essay in the beginning.

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"The last pages of a book are often found in the first."

"The Outsider is not an explanatory book. The absurd man does not explain; he describes. Nor is it a book which proves anything."

"The fact that certain great novelists have chosen to write in terms of images rather than of arguments reveals a great deal about a certain kind of thinking common to them all, a conviction of the futility of all explanatory principles, and of the instructive message of sensory impressions."

I want to say something just for a dramatic effect here - As I get older, the world seems more and more like a lie.

Hee.

>.<"

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Well, the truth is. I know my family and my few friends are never going to be the ones lying to me.

The world only seems like a lie sometimes because there are a lot of people who are living a lie.

Sometimes, when I just stop trying so hard to 'live', when I just internalize/externalize my boredom without going too crazy, when I know that boredom will just pass over but hopefully along the way I'm still accumulating something constructive and good in my life - I know I'm not one of the people who are living a lie. People are tiresome when they make it so obvious that they're just "living a lie".

I don't wanna have to pretend to live; I just want to live. Even if pretending to live gives the appearance of a more exciting life.

I don't wanna have to pretend to live. I'M JUST ALIVE. I just am.

>.<;;

I don't wanna do all the usual things from day-to-day. Sure, I don't mind them. All the usual activities. But ask me. Ask me what I think of life. And I could tell you some. And I could show you some. And they'll be things which have the likes of nothing you've ever seen before.

Lol.

Crapatular. Gotta go.